Wednesday, March 12, 2014

happy is as happy does.

happy. i am happy. i choose to be happy. the last while i have felt so much overwhelming gratitude for my life and the blessing i have from my father in heaven. is my life perfect? no. but that doesn't mean i'm not happy. sure there are things i'd like, more money-who wouldn't, more time-yes please, a new home-i'd take that. but the truth is i wouldn't be any happier if any of these blessings happened in my life. i think i learned to choose happiness since a young age because my parents were happy people and choose optimism and helped me see that life is better when we choose to be happy and we control our emotions. am i ever sad, upset, frusturated-yes and yes. but those seem to be fleeting emotions and happiness prevails. i recently found this article on ksl and i thought, yes, these are some of the things i try to do, these are some of the ways i've had to train myself to think, happiness is a habit. if you find yourself unhappy these are a few thoughts to maybe consider. if i'd add anything to the list it would be go about doing good. i'm find that i'm happy when i'm thinking of others, not myself.
here's some of the quotes i've gathered and love followed by the article, all the following words are from the article. bee happy.


I’ve done everything they say you should do to create success and happiness. I’ve sacrificed a lot and worked hard, and I’m very successful. But I’m definitely not happy. I’m always afraid of losing what I have. My marriage is OK, but not wonderful, and I don’t really feel loved. I don’t think I can be happy unless this changes. Bottom line, my life feels slightly empty in spite of my accomplishments. Any advice for me?


Anthony de Mello said, “There is only one cause of unhappiness: the false beliefs you have in your head, beliefs so widespread, so commonly held, that it never occurs to you to question them.”

The false belief, which causes most of our unhappiness, is the belief that our life should be different from what it is. We honestly believe that different circumstances would make us happier. If our spouse just loved us more, if we could get a promotion, if we could just move somewhere else, then we’d be happy.

But the idea that happiness is attained through external situations is a myth, because there are lots of people who have what you say you want and still aren’t happy.

There is only one cause of unhappiness: the false beliefs you have in your head, beliefs so widespread, so commonly held, that it never occurs to you to question them.

–Anthony de Mello

You were subconsciously trained as a child to believe that happiness is attached to external circumstances, but it isn't true. Happiness isn’t created through what you do, have, or experience. It doesn’t come from having someone love you. It doesn’t come from money, achievements or fame. It comes from something much deeper, yet more simple — it comes from a positive, accurate outlook or mindset about life.

Happiness is a choice you can make in any circumstance.

If you want to feel happier, you must change some of your false beliefs about life and learn how to choose happiness even when circumstances aren’t ideal.

It is possible to be happy even when life disappoints you. It’s not easy — but it is possible. That doesn’t mean you won’t feel sad and mourn a loss, but it means you won’t choose to live there. You can create a state of happiness inside yourself regardless of your circumstances, and this is really the only way you will ever get it.

Here are some suggestions to help you choose more happiness:

1. Count your blessings daily and focus on all that is good in your life. Remember there are people who would give anything to have what you have. You get to decide in each moment what you will focus on, the good or the bad. Focus on what’s good and trust that the bad is here to serve you for some reason.

2. Never set conditions on happiness. Make a personal policy that you will never say, “I’ll be happy when… ” Understand that happiness is a choice you make now, in this moment. You have just as much power to choose happiness today, as you will have in the future. Horace Friess said, “All seasons are beautiful for the person who carries happiness within.”

3. Decide that happiness is the essence of your character. You get to decide what kind of person you want to be. See yourself as a happy person. Write a policy that you will choose to be a happy person in every situation because it is the wisest choice to make.

4. Have more fun and be more fun. Laugh more often, collect jokes and funny stories to share with those around you. Make it fun to live with you. Be spontaneous, adventurous and positive. Be flexible and easy-going. Find ways to make whatever you do fun. Turn boring, frustrating things into a game. You have more natural ability to play than you realize.

5. Never gossip, criticize or judge others. Make a policy to see everyone as a student in the classroom of life, right on track in their unique journey of learning, with the same infinite value as you. Miserable people tend to focus on the bad in others. Happy people don’t need to do that. Make a policy around seeing others with wisdom and compassion and you will like yourself much better, which will create more happiness.

6. Eliminate fear-based thoughts by changing your fundamental beliefs about life. Most of my KSL articles and my book address exactly how to do this. Choose to see life as a classroom, not a test. Choose to believe that your value isn’t on the line. Choose to believe that everything happens for a reason, and that reason is always to serve your education. This means there are no accidents in your perfect classroom journey. I promise these mindset shifts will make life feel safer, which will create more happiness.

7. Choose to respond to every situation with love. Learn better communication skills, which will improve your relationships with your spouse, friends and children. Building rich relationships starts with better communication. (There is a Validating Communication Formula on my website that can help you do this and listen to last week’s Free Call.) The more you choose to respond with love, the less fear and misery you will experience in your life. Arthur Rubinstein, the classical pianist said, “I have found that if you love life, life will love you back.”

8. Simplify and take more breaks. You cannot create happiness if your life is too full of stressful obligations. You need some quiet, down-time to relax, unwind and have fun. It is your responsibility to make sure you get this. No one can give this to you. It must be a priority to make sure you get time for leisure activities.

9. Set goals and keep growing, learning and experiencing new things. A friend of mine, coach and author Darby Checketts, recommends making a bucket list with at least 150 things on it. Write down every place you’d like to visit, things you want to learn, experiences you’d like to have. Then get to work making your life interesting, full and exciting. People who are engaged in learning are always more happy. William Phelps said, “The happiest people are those who think the most interesting thoughts. Those who decide to use leisure as a means of mental development, who love good music, good books, good pictures, good company, good conversation, are the happiest people in the world. And they are not only happy in themselves, they are the cause of happiness in others.” Setting fun new goals will also do wonders for your self-esteem.

10. Take care of your body, eat healthy food, exercise and get plenty of rest. Your body can’t have a zest for life if you aren’t taking care of it. Exercise is a great cure for depression and losing some weight will give you more energy.

11. Make sure you aren’t clinically depressed. You may want to check with your doctor to make sure there isn’t a chemical component to your dark feelings. I highly recommend getting some professional help if you can’t pull yourself out of down feelings on your own.

12. Remember life is a journey not a destination. You must enjoy the journey and choose to appreciate the little wins, small blessings and sunny days. Wayne Dyer once said, “When you dance, your purpose is not to get to a certain place on the floor. It’s to enjoy each step along the way.”

We must take more responsibility for choosing how we feel. I will admit that I've been working too hard and choosing to feel overburdened — so I need to work on this with you.

Remember you get to decide the weather, wherever you are. It is easier to pretend you are powerless and blame others or life for how you feel, but this is a cop-out. You really do have the power to control your emotions and choose to be happy if you want to.

I’m going to work this with you.
We can do it!
Kimberly Giles is the founder and president of She is also the author of the new book CHOOSING CLARITY: The Path to Fearlessness. She offers free coaching calls every Tuesday night.

Saturday, March 1, 2014

Golden Girl

My sister dear, Shelley turned 23 on the 23rd of October; Her Golden Birthday! We had a little golden dinner for her to celebrate the women that she's become. She is truly a remarkable young lady and i'm so blessed to have her in my life. She is gorgeous beyond compare inside and out. She's one of the hardest working people I know and shoots for the stars. She's like me in a lot of ways and I take it as a huge compliment when people say i'm like her or my other sibilings. Here's to you Shelley! Our Golden Girl!
 Holly made this gorgeous cake with spun sugar.
 Just look at her and that smile. She's going to have a great year-i'm sure of it!

Wicked Audio @ CES: Las Vegas 2014

January we headed to Las Vegas for the International Consumer Electronics Show. A huge convention of all things gadgets, technology and futuristic concepts. My Dad's company Wicked Audio always has a booth. The show has large companies that we're all familiar with i.e. Sony, Nikon, etc and little booths with just one person with an idea they're hoping someone will pickup. It's an industry only show-no public. Luckily for us we were hosted by my Dad's company. We went down with Brandon's parents, Greg and Cindy. Greg is known as Go Go Gadget and loves himself some cool technology. Besides the show we visited the coke and m&m factory, saw the Bellagio fountains, went to the mob museum which we highly recommend, ate at the Bacchanal Buffet at Ceasar's Palace, Saw the Cirque show KA, visited the Container store and had a lot of fun. The trip went by fast and we stacked our days pretty full but had a wonderful time. 
Dad's Exhibit at CES: Their new headphones being released this year will blow your mind!

 Greg has a sixth sense for finding outdoor stuff at the tech show:)
 You have to do the around the world taste test at the Coke Factory. We all shared it. Some drinks were very good and others I can't imagine who would actually drink them! But they do in different countries all over the world.
 The mob museum is in an old court house later turned post office. I was equally fascinated with the building as the exhibit. I made Brandon go into the bathroom to see the gorgeous marble walls and antique light fixtures. The exhibit has been collected and presented in an amazing fashion. Very interesting although a little depressing when you realize how awful these people were and the things they did. 
Now onto the buffet: I'm always the food lover. I sent time alone at the sushi bar. It was really quite good. I loved the presentation more than anything. Little individual servings and artfully presented. The dessets were probably my favorite thing.

 Viva Las Vegas!

Christmas at the Finch's

Christmas in our little home has got to be one of my favorite times, I have hard time taking it down but remind myself there's always next year. This year was the "Year of the Pinecone" according to Brandon. He was a trooper as I scoured the ground of local parks, Pinecone Picking. We kept our Wrappings Au Natural with brown contractors paper and clippings, tags were paint sample chips and chalk. Really is was the most inexpensive route to take and that leaves more budget for what's being wrapped! Brandon wrapped his presents first one day while I was gone. I came home to gifts with loving terms and names etched on them. His idea, and I loved it and addressed my packages in similar style. We had a wonderful Christmas together and with our two families. We are always so amazed by people's thoughtfulness and generosity. This year my family "picked names" I'll admit I cried after when I realized I wouldn't have the opportunity to present everyone with a gift, even if it was just a candy bar or note, on Christmas day. Overall it was still wonderful Christmas and as much as I love giving, there's more to give then tangibles. That's what Christmas is about anyway. As is stands there's 30 people in our families and we're only going to get bigger. So I understand the logical side of picking names. We were gifted the most beautiful handmade wooden shelf from Jared and Carrilyne. It has warm wood tones that fit perfectly in our home. Merry Christmas to all! 
 Christmas Eve at our home: Santa likes Milano's
 Jazz wrapping paper Brandon Designed for his Dad's Gift
 I also had to give a shout out to my mom and her trees. Growing up we all loved our over the top decorated tree. Yes the smaller tree is leaning from the weight of the ornaments. We always could put our handmade ornaments from school or church on the tree, there was never a "it doesn't fit the theme" conversation. She just excitedly put them on, most of our odd creations are still there. She has however done a second tree in the front room that while still packed with eye candy is a little tamer then our Christmas Tree of old. 


Friday, February 28, 2014

Thanks for Giving

Thanksgiving is always just incredibly wonderful. I feel so blessed to have family so close by and I indeed have so much to be grateful for-I am so blessed by my Heavenly Father. I am so grateful for my loving husband, family, employment, our home we make beautiful together, warm clothes, health, means to help others, and the Gospel of Jesus Christ and his infinite Atonement. I have this everyday and need to show more gratitude. I am grateful for the Holiday that helps me remember and put my life back into perspective.
This year we were lucky enough to get to have a Thanksgiving meal with both families-talk about turkey! Both meals were perfect and we were so happy to be there. I was pretty happy with the Lattice Berry Pie I made.



Halloween this year we were Frankenstein and Bride. I gathered from existing and we bought Mr. Finch some Green Face paint that was much stickier that we expected. He was a trooper for a bit before it had to come off. Jaynes Family party is always fun with Grandpa Scary Story. Halloween Night we headed over to Stacy's home for delish eats and fun. 
Our pumpkins lit our family room and we enjoyed Brandon's Goulish Grin for All Hallows Eve. These are the only pictures I got but we had lots of cute, creative costumes, minions, and rock stars. Happy Haunting.